It’s Christmas, So I’m Supposed To Be Happy…Right?

Grace and peace, Saints.

Today is Christmas.  Millions of children will be bounding down the stairs or running into the living room to see what Mom and Dad, oh…er…Santa Claus bought…oops…brought them for Christmas.  Today the air will be filled with the sweet sound of cell phone ring tones, the boop and bop of Playstation II’s, the silent padding of fingers on smart phone touch screen displays, the barely audible, yet strangely irritating tapping of Nintendo DS controls, the aimless prating of “talking” dolls, the barking of dogs, the mewing of cats, the happy scurrying of rats, bells ringing, whistles blowing, children playing and fighting, parents arguing, in-laws criticizing, Uncle Arthur Lee bragging on how his son just got promoted to vice president of marketing, Uncle Percy bragging on how his son just got 15 full-rid scholarship offers: Aunt Eunice bragging on how her daughter got a marriage proposal from some senator (who is already married); Uncle Charles putting mistletoe over every woman or girl’s head so he can get a smooch; old, touchy-feely Uncle Chester pretending to be happy to see everybody so he can get a free feel, while his wife’s lethal gaze bores a hole in his neck from her corner on the far side of the room; cousin Constance explaining how her husband Sheldon is so busy managing his successful business that he couldn’t pull himself away from his work long enough to come over for Christmas dinner, when the truth is that he is spending Christmas with his mistress’s family pretending to be her fiancée, and let’s not even go into the bill for all this trouble…Aaahhh, Christmas!

Christmas is supposed to be a joyful time, but let’s face it: for many people, Christmas is not a joyful time at all.  It’s not even a happy time.  For many, Christmas is a time of sadness, loneliness, anger, depression, and profound emptiness.  One reason for this is that we have been programmed by the media to believe that Christmas is supposed to be a happy time, but all the things the media teaches us make Christmas a happy time are material things.  And material things cost money. 

Food costs money, but food at Christmas time costs lots of money.  Presents cost money, but Christmas presents cost lots of money.  Airplane tickets cost money, but airplane tickets at Christmastime cost lots of money.  Gas costs money, but gas at Christmastime costs lots of money.  Hotels rooms cost money, but hotel rooms at Christmastime cost lots of money.  Christmas decorations cost money.  Baby food and diapers for the trip cost money.  New dishes and silverware cost money.  That diamond ring you bought your girlfriend in your Christmas-romantic-comedy-induced psychosis cost a gang of money.  And so on and so forth und so weiter.  Money, money, money, money…MONEY!

It should come as no great surprise that those who get all our Christmas money are the same folks who make the movies, television shows, commercials, and music that program you to go out and spend all that money.  Don’t you wish you could send them the bill?

For many, Christmas is also a time to remember lost loved ones.  For these people, one of the happiest times was the last Christmas the whole family was together.  I am one of those people, and, for me, that Christmas happened in 1990.  Four of those who were present at that Christmas gathering no longer walk the earth, while another is at this very moment incarcerated, another is estranged, and yet another is intangible.  Every individual, imperfect, and unique one of those people mattered and does matter to me, so it is impossible for me not to think about them at this time.  Truly, I can understand the deep sadness many feel for this reason during Christmas.

Another reason many are not happy during Christmas is because, for them, it is a time of deep reflection.  When we see others looking so happy (if only on television), we wonder why we are not.  We wonder what is lacking in our lives that keep us from enjoying the same ostensive happiness everyone else enjoys.  We wonder why we are so sad, while everyone else seems so glad.  We have always had the awareness that we are not in a good place, but because most of the people we know are in the same place we are, it is easy to pretend that everything is OK.  But, there is something about Christmas that destroys all our illusions and pretentions.  Christmas is a time of stark reality. (Read Truth: John 14:16).

Another reason many are so sad during Christmas is because they are alone.  Again, we have been programmed by the media to believe that Christmas is a time to be with family, friends, or a loved one.  When we turn on the TV and see families gathered around the dinner table, or friends sharing a cup of hot cocoa in front of the fireplace, or lovers on the couch snuggled up under a blanket with a bowl of hot popcorn watching TV, and we look around us and see nothing but a gas-fired stove and Oscar, the mutt looking pitifully at us, or a Spartan hotel room, or a crowded homeless shelter, or a tent in the dry desert of Iraq or South Sudan or the cold, barren mountains of Afghanistan, we think there must be something wrong with us because, here it is Christmas and we are all alone and have no one to share it with.

Still another reason I imagine many are sad during Christmas is because they feel this might be their last Christmas.  For those lying in a hospital bed or at home with a terminal illness, I imagine it hurts to think that we may never see our loved ones faces around the dinner table at Christmas again.  We may never see our children open another Christmas present.  We may never say “Thanks Dad!” or “Thanks Mom!” and we may never again thank everyone for coming to Christmas dinner.

There are probably a myriad other reasons many are sad during Christmas, and each one of those reasons is legitimate and real to someone.  It would therefore be folly to say that any reason for a person’s sadness during Christmastime is unwarranted.  I will say, however, that while the reason may be warranted, our rea-son-ing is often faulty.  You see, Christmas is not supposed to be a happy time; Christmas is supposed to be a joyous time.  Happiness and joy are not the same thing, though they are often used interchangeably. 

 We are usually happy when we get what we want, and sad (or at least disappointed) when we don’t.  If we get something we always wanted, we are happy.  Happy is contentment in the secular sense. 

The Christian is supposed to be joyful even when we don’t get what we want.  Why?  Because we know that Jesus Christ, who is God Almighty, is able to give us anything we want if He is so inclined.  Therefore, when we don’t get what we want when we want it, we know that 1.  He has something better for us, or 2. He hasn’t given us what we want yet, but will in the future, or 3.  He doesn’t think we need what we have asked Him for.  An All-Powerful God has assured the Christian that if we ask, He will give us anything we want (within reason) according to His will.  Therefore, when we don’t get what we want, when we want it, we know that if we are walking with Jesus like we ought to, regardless of our circumstances, the will of God is being accomplished in our lives.  And the Christian is most joyful when God’s will is being done in his life.  Joyful, then, is contentment in the Christian sense. 

For most people, the day which has come to be called Christmas is not the celebration of the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  Jesus was born into the world for one reason and one reason only: to die for the sins of mankind.  All mankind is sinful, and every person who has ever lived needed Jesus to die on the cross for his sins; for it is only the death of Jesus that made it possible for us to escape the condemnation of Hell and judgment and be acceptable to come before the presence of a Holy God.  When Adam sinned, all mankind became separated from God and received a death sentenced.  Ancient man knew this very well, and it was for this reason that the wise men from the East traveled a great distance through many perils just to prostrate themselves at the feet of Jesus.  They were grateful for the sacrifice they knew He would make at Calvary.  It was a joyous occasion for them.

The same holds true for Christians today.  The Christian understands that the Bible says, “the wages of sin is death” (Romans 6:23).  He knows that his only hope is in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.  He knows the value and importance of the Blood.  He knows that if Jesus Christ had not been born, then He could not have died.  And if Jesus Christ had not died, then all hope would be lost: we would be dead in our sins.  Christmas for the Christian is a time of joy and celebration.

The unrepentant sinner does not know this.  To him, Christmas is whatever the media says it is.  And the media says that Christmas is about presents, food, drinks, and family gatherings.  The media says that something is wrong if you’re alone on Christmas.  The media says that if you don’t put up a Christmas tree, and if it’s not snowing outside, then “it’s just not Christmas.”  Even movies that seem to expose the rampant consumerism associated with Christmas (“How The Grinch Stole Christmas” and “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation” readily come to mind) still convey the message that it must be snowing outside to be Christmas or that Christmas is about family gatherings.  The media makes it about the externals and not the internals.  No wonder so many people are miserable at Christmas.

If you are a person who is sad at Christmas for any reason other than the loss of a loved one or that Christmas is associated with a particularly traumatic event, you have good reason to be: you are still dead in your sins and on a collision course with Hell.  It’s just that simple.  Christmas is not about presents.  Christmas is not about food.  Christmas is not even about families.  Christmas is about Jesus.  If you have not made Jesus Christ your Savior, then you have nothing to be joyous about. 

If you are uncomfortable or sad during Christmas for any of the reason except death or trauma associated with the holiday or for any other reason out of your control, take it from me: you have been programmed to feel that way.  Satan does that so that a day which is supposed to be associated with the greatest day in the history of the world and should, therefore be a joyful occasion, is, to the contrary, associated with spending money you don’t have, slaving for hours over a hot stove, dredging up old hurts and tearing the scabs off healing wounds, lying, putting on airs, and being sad and embarrassed for being broke, poor, having no family, and/or being alone.  Satan has made it so that we can’t wait for Christmas to be over with, so we can stop being “happy,” or feeling like a loser for being sad.  This should not be.

If you are sad because it’s Christmas, ask yourself why.  If the reason is because you don’t know Jesus, the Person for whom that day is named, and, therefore, have no relationship with Him, and, therefore are lost and dead in your sins, and, therefore are on your way to Hell, and, therefore, have no hope, and, therefore, have no reason to be joyous, and, therefore, are sad, then why don’t you make Jesus your Savior today?  It takes less than a minute, and will be the best decision you ever made.  Then, God willing, next Christmas you will have cause to celebrate! (or not).

Be encouraged and look up, for your redemption draweth nigh!

The Still Man

P.S. If depression or bipolar disorder is a recurrent problem for you, you may be under a generational curse.  Find out how you break free HERE.

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